Articles on Trauma and Relationships

Facebook Made Me a Bad Friend
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Facebook Made Me a Bad Friend

I'm in transition now to using tech more consciously. I've seen the impact it's had on my well-being and negotiating this relationship more proactively is now a major factor in my self-care.

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A Leader is Someone on Purpose
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

A Leader is Someone on Purpose

It's a gift to witness ourselves and each other at near-breaking points. To stand beside a grieving friend or a colleague struggling with the right thing to do is a kind of leadership. I don't think, as leaders, we give ourselves nearly enough credit for the work we do of supporting each other. It's as vital as the work we do of service in the world.

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The Minimum Viable Product of a Daily Yoga Practice
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

The Minimum Viable Product of a Daily Yoga Practice

If you optimize your yoga practice, you get the same benefits in less than half the time. With a consistent 3-5 x week practice of 15 minutes, you will notice measurable differences to your health and happiness.Don't take my word for it. Try it yourself!

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Your Path on Purpose
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Your Path on Purpose

Learning to voice our needs with confidence is crucial for changemakers. We're often people-pleasers in the extreme and somewhere in our programming, decided that others' needs are more important than our own. Re-orienting ourselves around self-care and our right to be healthy and happy allows us to claim our power that much more deeply.

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The Highly-Sensitive Changemaker
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

The Highly-Sensitive Changemaker

High-sensitivity means that our nervous systems are more acutely aware of and receive more external stimulus, compared to others. It's a trait that shows up in about 20% of animals and it’s a finely tuned adaptation mechanism for herd survival.

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Making the Mind an Ally
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Making the Mind an Ally

On a personal level, when we look to the mind to solve our problems, the very beliefs and structures that we use to make sense of our world can make it almost impossible to find a real solution, much less help us out of the increasing stress response we feel.

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Why Our Needs are Non-Negotiable
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Why Our Needs are Non-Negotiable

If others are so much worse off, struggling to survive or make it to the next day, we tell ourselves, isn't self-care a luxury? If others have needs that must be attended to, shouldn't we give up our own need for well-being so that theirs’ can be met?

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The Bystander is the Fulcrum
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

The Bystander is the Fulcrum

If we don't stand proactively and aggressively for the civil liberties we believe in and that others have sacrificed even their lives for, then we allow the wave of hate and intolerance sweeping not just the US, but other places in the world, to win.

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The Journey of Self-Care
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

The Journey of Self-Care

Whether we've given up taking care of ourselves or are far too rigid in our daily regimes, both sides of the wellness spectrum can be damaging for our physical health and feed unhealthy parts of our psyche. What to do?

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Why Wellness Isn’t Optional
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Why Wellness Isn’t Optional

Instead of dealing with just one area of technology experiencing rapid, runaway change, we’re seeing many of them become exponential at around the same time. Where the pace was fast before, now it becomes turbo-charged, much like the “insane” (now the “ludicrous”) button on a Tesla car.

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What’s the Best Way to Change the World?
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

What’s the Best Way to Change the World?

Creating something new and amazing is so much more energizing and attractive then getting locked into the old and antagonistic energy of opposition. It takes practice and concerted intention to rise out of the old ways of doing things, and to create new pathways towards change that align more directly with the world that we want to create together.

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Thriving in a World of Accelerating Technological Change
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Thriving in a World of Accelerating Technological Change

Technology is a human invention, and its value depends entirely on how we decide to use it. Not just the titans in Silicon Valley, but all of us — what do we decide to do with the amazing tools we have created for ourselves?

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How to Lean In to Vulnerability (and Be a Better Leader)
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

How to Lean In to Vulnerability (and Be a Better Leader)

I hope that my own sharing about vulnerability inspires you to explore what more vulnerability could look like in your own work, in your own way. I hope that there’s something hard that you want to do that just might change the world.

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Notes from a Tropical Fever
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Notes from a Tropical Fever

There were a handful of times, before I became sick, that I was acutely aware that I could not continue with the level of activity or the pace of work that I’d taken on. I felt myself physically tire and begin to experience a burning sense of fatigue, like overworked muscles asking for rest.

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10 Ways to Rework the Brain for Health and Happiness
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

10 Ways to Rework the Brain for Health and Happiness

Old ideas about the planet’s seemingly endless capacity for growth or our inability to learn new things or make lasting change are falling by the wayside, rapidly being disproved by evidence-based research. I want to share what this all means for us aid workers, because it’s important and empowering for those of us creating impact around the world.

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Why It’s No Surprise that Your Aid Job is Bringing You Down
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Why It’s No Surprise that Your Aid Job is Bringing You Down

No one who has worked three months in the aid industry thinks that it’s a perfect system. If it was, wouldn’t we have fixed poverty and inequality and health and education and ecosystem degradation and fill-in-the-blank by now?

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Facing Fear (It’s Easier Than You Think)
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Facing Fear (It’s Easier Than You Think)

As my friends and colleagues in West Africa are dealing with an incredibly challenging and often terrifying Ebola outbreak, and I sit up late writing from my new home in Indonesia, I’ve been thinking a lot about fear and how it colors the landscape of our experience — if we let it.

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Coping with Ebola Virus in West Africa
Elie Losleben Calhoun Elie Losleben Calhoun

Coping with Ebola Virus in West Africa

For those in our tribe who are dealing with Ebola virus in West Africa, may this contribute to the discussion and dialogue within your own process of decision-making. For those of you in non-affected areas, may this give you a window into a process that I hope you never have to face.

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